I've been so caught up in life and trying to get ready for Christmas, that I've been slacking with posting. This week's events have made me feel obligated to post, to let go of these feelings and how deeply I feel about what happend. Last week the Sandy Hook Massacre took place. I avoided watching the news and I turned the radio down each time I heard any mention of it. I did a pretty good job all weekend long until last night. I went to MSN to log-in to hotmail and there on the screen appeared a little girls photo. I saw the words Sandy Hook Elementary next to her name I automatically knew...All the emotions that were bottled up, the emotions that I didn't know were there came out. I begin to sob like a baby, and I couldn't stop. My little "Brownie" walked in on me and was so afraid. She went to get her Dad who immediately thought the worst because I'd just got off the phone. I explained to him what was wrong and he just held me. I haven't felt those emotions in so long, they were real, raw and uncut. The last time I felt this was when Faith was in the NICU and I got that call and her Doctor told me she was "worried." I could not begin to imagine those mother's grief. There are some days that I am so tired in the morning and I complain when my kids want breakfast, I'll rush them out of the house or fuss about the hangers that someone left on the floor. For what? Why? What would I do if...Every so often terrible things happen and everyone rallies together and then months later some of us forget. Don't get me wrong I want to forget this event, I want it to have never happened but I also pray that these children's deaths were not in vain. I pray that these families are able to heal and that school's take measures to insure that our children are just as protected as the animals at the shelter or even the zoo. Even they have protection to prevent anyone from getting to them to do harm. I pray that this world can come together and that people with mental illnesses are able to get the help before something as tragic as this happens again. I pray that this world can just slow down long enough to appreciate those they love instead of getting caught up in politics, racism or simple things such as facebook beef. If we ever needed religion and to be believers, now is the time. This is my Prayer. Amen.
